A new journey

Regular readers know I live in a relaxed but formal protocol-based D/s dynamic. I am privileged to be introducing to our dynamic a occasional consensual plaything for myself and my partner.

Here are all the blogs we’ve written about this:

• Entering another’s world (totallycoverme’s first blog)
• The toy, the plaything, the added extra (curvy bottom’s first thoughts on this)
• The role of a fucktoy (how it so doesn’t feel like a threesome – Belasarius’s view)
• Cunt punching (a specific act of sadism)
• About last night (first meeting, as a four, after the “three” was established)
• Preparing for service (totallycoverme’s physical preparations)
• Performing Nadu (a compromising position for totallycoverme?)
• Totally covering totallycoverme’s fou-fou (waxplay)
• You can see me, but I’m not an exhibitionist (what totallycoverme thinks of her pictures)
• The dominant’s perspective (my view of the challenges – so far)
• They’re NOT my orgasms (totallycoverme on losing control of self-pleasure)

What we are trying to do

This third person wishes to be used, degraded, objectified and to be an outlet for the sadism that I only rarely do with my partner. I am creating a set of protocols that we will all use when we are together. I won’t introduce them all at the beginning, as it’s as much about the journey as the goal. The baseline is that this person obeys the same rules as my partner, but with less leeway.

I am thinking of ideas to lessen this person’s sense of identity, independence and autonomy in the home and when we attend events together. I am not all together sure that this will work given my partner’s protective nature:,an alternative may be to create a hierarchy using these Japanese naming protocols.

We know the person who wants to do this quite well: it has a strong need to serve and be useful but also wishes to be challenged (it’s not bratty). It wants a consensual non-consent dynamic in which things happen, within its limits, that it doesn’t like or want at the time: it feels uplifted by these experiences later and they get stored in the good memory bins in her bonce.

curvy_bottom is as excited as I am at having use of this person. My desired dynamic is that I am the dominant, my partner is the loved submissive and the object of this post is a useful plaything, treasured but, when present, used for our satisfaction, at my direction. She may turn out to be a depersonalised object or a human pet.

Our friend has her own fully committed M/s relationship and her partner is a person we know and respect. Everyone involved believes it is entirely positive for all concerned. If it isn’t it will stop.

I’ve made this a bigger deal than it is. It’s about an occasional play partner. But, for all of us, the headspace is the biggest thing – which is why I’m thinking hard about it all.

This page includes links to all the blogs I (and others involved) write about this. Right now, its new and we don’t know if it will last or where it will take us.

Links to blogs

• Entering another’s world (totallycoverme’s first blog)
• The toy, the plaything, the added extra (curvy bottom’s first thoughts on this)
• The role of a fucktoy (how it so doesn’t feel like a threesome – Belasarius’s view)
• Cunt punching (a specific act of sadism)
• About last night (first meeting, as a four, after the “three” was established)
• Preparing for service (totallycoverme’s physical preparations)
• Performing Nadu (a compromising position for totallycoverme?)
• Totally covering totallycoverme’s fou-fou (waxplay)
• You can see me, but I’m not an exhibitionist (what totallycoverme thinks of her pictures)

Footnote

I would welcome advice from people with any experience of anything like this. What do you think are the biggest challenges in making this work? What are the hurts, upsets and pitfalls that could affect any of us and which I should try to foresee? What are the triggers that, for just a few hours, turn a charming, exciting, human being into a willing object?

If any reader has been objectified like this, what makes it work for you?

All genuine advice is immensely welcome.