Yoga, And Serious Fun (IC, 13 April 05)

BelasariusMy submissive took up yoga – and ultimately made it an important part of her life. We thought of it originally to enhance our enjoyment of bondage – it seemed a good way of improving suppleness to give us more play options. We had no idea that, over time, what it would really achieve, was mental stamina – her ability to tolerate all sorts of trussings for longer and longer improved enormously, and she put this down to mental focus.. and her ability to focus was unlocked by her yoga.

 

But, what I really want to write about today is the connection we discovered between yoga and submission. I’m not saying that one directly relates to and improves the other, but that a number of qualities that yoga, and meditation, seem to encourage the development of a strong and capable submissive personality.

 

Petra's Yoga Poses around the world
Petra’s Yoga Poses around the world (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

Two examples:

 

Inner peace: It’s not always possible to be content with the decisions that have been made for you. Contemplation helps.

 

Self discipline: A fundamental and often overlooked quality of submission, I guess strongly related to “inner peace”: Strong self discipline eliminates laziness and encourages its possessor to strive always to improve.

 

As a footnote, I’d like to comment on fun. Several here have wondered whether the serious and intense nature of the relationship I was fortunate enough to experience meant it was not much fun. This is probably the most painful thing I’ve written to date: Gosh it was fun, it was joyous, mischievous, exciting, surprising and enormous fun. Two people had pledged themselves to design their entire lives to please the other. It was a game. A game played at Olympian standards – but still a game. A game where you had to know when not to smirk… But always a game. Maybe, apart from politics, the only game for grown-ups.

I am migrating my blog from UK BDSM website, Informed Consent (due to close in February 2013), to this, my private blog and also to the new community website it seems most likely that c_b and I will use going forward, Fetbook. This blog “The Rules We Lived By” was first published on Informed Consent on  6 April 2005. My private blog is belasarius.com

 

 

 

The Rules we Lived By (IC, 6 April 2005)

acedc11cbeb3a2a0b4e3bca15378bec4This is really a continuation of my last post. I thought I’d share what service meant to me and my significant other, so many years ago…

First of all, service was not (except in special and particular cases) about cooking (try keeping me out of the kitchen!), cleaning or other domestic chores. We both worked and domestic drudgery was shared. No, service was about rituals and rules that shaped our lives and the way we related to  . It evolved into a complicated pattern and included many specifics all designed to pin us into our roles as master and servant (I’m not sure slave is quite right – I think we aspired in that direction but never quite achieved it).

Some of the specifics included:

She never spoke unless spoken to or unless seeking and being given permission to speak. This pertained in private and in public – in public situations we used subtle signals to ask, give or deny permission.

I would always let her know when I was expected home each evening – and she would endeavour to be there before me, groomed, lubricated and available in case of my need and with my favourite drink mixed and ready.

In company, at parties, etc, she would fetch both our drinks, she would stand in queues at the buffet/barbie, etc.

At home, she would not sit in my presence without permission, nor ever on furniture unless invited. In public, she would always sit at my feet if at all seemly.

She did not pee nor poo without my permission.

She laid out my clothes of an evening and always tied my tie in the mornings.

She would not feed herself without my permission. It was common for us to share a large plate, with me feeding her, or her dipping in when given permission.

She would usually retire 20 minutes before me, to groom, shave and prepare herself in case I required her services.

We shared a love of books. We’d often turn off the TV and she’d read to me, aloud.

She always drew my baths.

Bathtub in a house in ancient Herculaneum
Bathtub in a house in ancient Herculaneum (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

She always sought approval for anything she was to wear, if I had not already made a choice.

In public I always opened doors for her, helped her into cars, did her seatbelt. If ever asked why, we always said to protect her fingernails from harm: They were, in fact, spectacular.

I am migrating my blog from UK BDSM website, Informed Consent (due to close in February 2013), to this, my private blog and also to the new community website it seems most likely that c_b and I will use going forward, Fetbook. This blog “The Rules We Lived By” was first published on Informed Consent on  6 April 2005. My private blog is belasarius.com

 

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