Possession, possessiveness and protectiveness.

My girl is my possession. But sometimes she can’t quite understand my possessiveness.

Why, she says, should I be possessive when I know, as night follows day, that she is mine? She has a point. But it won’t stop me.

Doms foolish enough to approach her ( not many these days – in fact none for a while) get a dusty answer. Get stuck with a single dom at a munch ( even the nicest of chaps) and she gets told to circulate.

It’s not, I tell myself, a lack of trust in her or a lack of maturity in me.

No, it’s that she’s mine, mine, mine and she’s worth having. And I like the world to know she’s mine. And, most of all, I like her to know she’s mine and guarded. Protected. I am her rutting stag.

I am protective too. Even when I hurt her, I take pains not to harm her and, after, I cherish her and again feel she is mine.

She has a protective/possessive streak too. I am her man right or wrong. In public at least. On our own, I do get given advice. Quite often actually.

And the protectiveness we feel extends beyond ourselves. It’s, maybe, a weakness. We both move to protect friends, even when they don’t need protecting. It’s not such a great weakness I guess. Possessiveness, outside our own relationship, would be.

I’ve been around long enough in the D/s community to see that what goes around, comes around, I think, more often than in the life experienced before.

We are a small, sexually focused, community. Relationships can mean more than only couples. People play together who have little else in common. People play together who are good friends and who see this as nothing more than friendship. people don’t play together but, severally, they are lovers.

Possessiveness, in these circumstances, is a poison that could quickly make it difficult to stay friends with anyone you liked. Taking sides in relationship break- ups would do it too. But unwise possessiveness means it is impossible to keep up an equable chumminess with someone who was your playmate and has moved on or found others to play with.

So. I won’t ever deny my protectiveness. But I’ll do all I can to curb my possessiveness. Except in the case of my girl, of course. She’s mine, mine, mine.

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